Sunday, September 25, 2011

Republican Flavor of the Week

The carousal that is the Republican presidential race is a funny carnival.

There was Michele Bachmann in front as the Great White (hooded) Hope. It didn't take long for people to realize that she was so crazy she made batshit look sane.

Then came Rick Perry. Texan through and through, he had a lock on the nomination until he opened his mouth and couldn't spell cat even if you spotted him the C and T and gave him three shots at the middle letter.

This week's favorite, Herman Cain, has a lot going for him with the Republican base. He has looked back nostalgically on Southern segregation and supports restoring slave wages. Of course, Cain has a subtle flaw for the Republican base. Imagine how they would react if both major parties field black candidates.
The Republican Wing of the Republican Party.
I bet Rick Santorum will get his chance next week. He is whiter than Wonder Bread, an advantage to the base. His plan is to restore American greatness by replicating the economic system of medieval Italy using the philosophies of Niccolò Machiavelli and Cesare Borgia including an Inquisition for those insufficiently Christian.

Behind them all lurks Mitt Romney. Always everyone's third or fourth choice, Mitt is universally loathed. But, he has one advantage over all the other candidates, the base can't hate him any more than it already does.

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