Thursday, August 23, 2012

A Pro-Tax Republican

Republicans hate taxes. But at least one Republican, Judge Tom Head of Lubbock, TX, has found a cause worth taxing for. He wants a 1.7 cent property tax increase to fund a militia to defend Lubbock against invading UN armies under orders from a reelected President Obama.
Some may wonder why the UN would bother with the 11th largest town in Texas since it is located somewhere between the middle of nowhere and the center of Hell. And especially since most liberals believe the best course of action is kicking all of Texas out of the Union. Maybe giving it back to Mexico although I doubt they'd take it.

Others may wonder what kind of an army a pitiful 1.7 cent tax could raise. If Judge Head were serious he would be advocating mandatory conscription of every able-bodied Lubbockian. Such a robust Lubbockian Army could then force march to Fort Worth and capture the Comanche Peak nuclear power plant. As a nuclear power, Lubbock could then dictate terms to the rest of the world.

Houston Press on Judge Head
An embarrassed Lubbocknick

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

This might be the biggest piece of garbage I've ever read.