Stop the World, I Want to Get Off

All I want to do right now is write a nice long piece on the soiled doves of the Old West but the news keeps coming at me like an avalanche down a ski slope being hit by a tsunami while the sun is obscured by a massive oncoming asteroid.

That Mueller Firing Thing
Those of us who can remember back to last summer can recall the rumors that Trump wanted to fire the special counsel (see link above). All the New York Times has done is sound journalistic research to confirm what we all had suspected.

Trump Says 'Fake' Three Times
Like a childishly magical incantation, Trump called the Times reporting "fake news" three times. Did you ever notice he always repeats things thrice? If he says the phrase "no obstruction" once he has to say it twice more in the same sentence. It's a blunt tell that he is lying his eyes out.

Five Republicans Tried to Meet With Neo-Fascist
A group of congressmen including Steve King, Dana Rohrabacher, and Louis Gohmert planned to meet the leader of the Czech Republic's SDP party to discuss concerns over "demographic changes." The SDP party wants to address those changes by gassing Jews, gays, and Gypsies. It was canceled at the last minute, probably because people noticed they were meeting with fucking Nazis.

Trump Booed at Davos
When he brought his America First, Fuck Everyone Else tour to the world economic forum.

Let's Party Like It's 1930
Who doesn't want to go back to the good old days - Ten Cents a Dance was playing on the Victrola, Babe Ruth was still knocking the cover off the ball, Clyde Tombaugh discovered Pluto, and Republicans passed the Smoot-Hawley Tariff Act that turned the stock market crash from a recession into a global depression.

Trump wants tariffs (see the link already). He wants tariffs more than cheeseburger. Trump wants to put tariffs on pretty much everything because he thinks it will stop the world from laughing at him. And it will, too. Tariffs stop global trade which will cause economies to collapse. The world will stop laughing at Trump then. Starvation does that.

Stop the World, I Want to Get Off
If you didn't get the reference, this is the title of a 1960's Broadway musical about a miserable circus clown who can't even find happiness when elected to public office. It's most famous song was "What Kind of Fool Am I."