The Future of Professional Golf

Now, something completely different. At right is the future of professional golf in the United States. It is the proposal for an indoor golf course from Monolithic Commercial Buildings. I know it sounds comic bookish, but, I swear, I didn't make that name up. The reason I know this is the future of professional golf is that the men on the PGA tour couldn't play their tournament today because of conditions.

There were no dangerous thunderstorms nor was there heavy rain flooding the course. There wasn't a plague of black flies nor did an earthquake open up a Hellmouth on the 14th tee. No, it was too windy for the little wusses. The official reason that play was canceled was that winds gusting to 40 mph made conditions too difficult. I can't call them girly-men because the women of the LPGA played today with wind gusting to 45 mph.

The fact is, the PGA men have become incapable of playing in anything other than optimal conditions. They whine if there is a misting rain. The bitch if the sun sets too soon or even if they get shadows on the greens. They won't play at all in wind. Too hot or too cold, the temperature is never just right. It will not be long before they insist that all tournaments are played on indoor golf courses.