Saturday, November 18, 2017

Proof Americans Are Getting Dumber

If you want proof of the dumbing down of America look no further than the Model T Ford.
The Model T was the common man's automobile from 1908 to 1927. Priced at just $300, inflation adjusted that would be $4200 today, you would be hard pressed to find a used 12 year-old Ford Taurus for a similar value. It was the car for every regular Joe. The thing is, it was harder to drive a Model T than flying a Boeing 747.

Starting the Car
1) Under the front fender set the chock, then turn the crank a quarter turn to prime the carburetor.
2) Get in the car and set the coil box switch to magneto, retard the timing, move the throttle stalk downwards just a bit to idle. Don't forget to put the car in the neutral that sets the rear brakes.
3) Get back out of the car and turn the crank WITH YOUR LEFT HAND. If you use your right hand, when the car starts and the crank kicks back it will break your arm.

Driving the Car
Now you are ready to drive.
There is no accelerator pedal. To make the car go forward you use the emergency brake that doubles as a clutch while setting the gas flow with the lever on the right side of the steering column and adjusting spark with the lever on the left side of the steering column while setting the speed clutch which is the leftward floor pedal.

To slow the car for a corner adjust the speed clutch (left) pedal to neutral, it's somewhere between high speed and low speed, while using the brake (right) pedal. It's probably a good idea to reduce the gas flow and retard the spark so you don't stall out. Don't forget to steer!

Damn, you're in a ditch.

Your grandparents drove these Tin Lizzies with as much skill as you drive your air conditioned SUV with cruise control, power steering, and a cup holder for your half soy latte.

Face it, your grandparents were a lot smarter than you. They had to be to drive that thing. If you tried to drive a Model T you'd piss yourself just pulling out of the driveway.

The Model T is absolute proof that Americans are getting dumber. Oh, and Henry Ford was an anti-Semitic racist.


Paul Gottlieb said...

My Grandfather was a fine man, but he couldn't troubleshoot a wireless router if his life depended on it

Anonymous said...

I think it is just proof Americans are less inclined to tolerate 'busy work' and dangerous activities. Automatic spark advance and electric starters prevented unnecessary work and deaths where breaking an arm in early 20 century could kill you. You would be on firmer ground that Americans are getting dumber by pointing out that Americans voted to elect G.W.Bush but then reelected him plus also allowing the Electoral College to deteriorate to a rubber stamp for political parties instead of doing it's job of weeding out unacceptable winners of the Presidential election.

Jerry Shepherd said...

I'm afraid the Model T wouldn't pass any liability standards that are in effect today. The mechanical braking system would be totally unacceptable today and they would roll over just going around a corner and there were no creature comforts that we take for granted and the worst automobile built in the late 70's would be a 100 times more reliable than to T ever was. And that is just getting started.