Metal Detector Etiquette: San Diego Court Division

In short, in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral,
He is the very model of a modern Major-General.
~ Pirates of Penzance, Gilbert & Sullivan

Just finished a tour of jury duty and I have discovered a foolproof way to smuggle a gun into the San Diego County courthouse.

1. Buy a military uniform on E-Bay, Navy seems to work.
2. Go to a swap meet and get a nice selection of service patches and medals.
3. Get a haircut - look neat, trim, military-like.
4. Casually walk through the metal detector with your gun well hidden.
5. After you set off the alarm, the bored sheriff deputies will smile and wave you through.

I saw this work with Navy blues and Marine camos. Apparently, in this post 9-11 world, the San Diego Sheriff Department gives a free-pass to anyone in uniform. The courthouse metal detection protocol has gotten very casual. Sloppy even. The chatter in the jury lounge was that it is harder to get scissors onto an airplane than it is to get a gun into court. If you try this, remember, you didn't hear if from me.